Article: 178467 of talk.bizarre From: moxie@jazzmin.vnet.net (the stark fist of retribution) Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,comp.bugs.misc Subject: Re: Countdown To QUALITY Date: 1 Dec 1994 08:36:55 -0000 Organization: the fog Lines: 70 Message-ID: <3bk1v7$m8s@jazzmin.vnet.net> References: <9411300727.AA08621@cml.rice.edu> Status: O In article <9411300727.AA08621@cml.rice.edu>, Andrew Solberg <andsol@cml.rice.edu> wrote: > >December 1 is Fail To Suck Day. For that entire day, post only your >absolute *best* and *brightest*. Be original, creative, and utterly >amusing. Devastate us with your wit. Baffle us with your insights. >Stun us with your grammatical ability. > >No follow-ups. No flames. No cross-posts. Just the GOOD STUFF. although i actually have nothing of particular interest to say, i feel it my duty as a frequent poster of follow-ups and flames to speak in defense of those of us who are wise enough to know that while our prose is not necessarily deathless, the thoughts of those who have gone before us, no matter how banal, may be an ideal springboard from which to launch an entertaining and painstakingly crafted digression; indeed, i feel compelled to mention that i am actually somewhat offended by your assertion that followups, flames, and the like, are all without worth, since i have spent nearly seven years honing these arts to the keenest edge my humble ability can aspire to, and i must admit i occasionally feel a small measure of pride at my efforts, despite the fact that they are couched in a guise some choose to dismiss out of hand: for instance, you may have noticed that i am now on the eighteenth line of this sentence, with no end in sight, which i believe merits some notice, considering that i have not yet violated any significant rules of grammar other than the commonly-taught guideline against the use of run-on sentences -- an art which i feel has been sadly abused, and which ought, in my opinion, to be considered a legitimate art form in its own right, despite the long centuries of unwarranted disdain that have been heaped upon it by the academic community, an establishment with whose overall arrogance and lack of vision i have frequently found it necessary to take issue, especially in the matter of its insistence upon forcing its innocent young victims to read perfectly odious works by such so-called writers as Hemingway and Faulkner, neither of whom could have realistically hoped to succeed in writing their respective ways out of a soggy wax-paper bag such as the ones in which one's chow mein noodles are often provided when one orders egg drop soup to go from the take- out chinese place on the corner, and in fact, whose deaths have, i feel, been nothing less than a boon to society, and could only have been surpassed in their beneficence had both writers' entire works and all published versions thereof been interred with them at the time of burial; we frequently see writing nearly as lackluster here in talk.bizarre that fulfills none of the arbitrary criteria by which you so unfairly choose judge the quality of a post, and which often, in fact, lays (dubious) claim to originality, despite the obvious cognitive deficiencies displayed by its authors. surely you see my point. m hey rocky, watch me pull an elephant out of my hat! -- skeleton rattle your mouldy leg all men s lovers come to this archy