Article: 178551 of talk.bizarre
From: jvogel@math.rutgers.edu (jeff vogel)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: JERKING OFF: an erotic poem.
Date: 1 Dec 1994 13:01:13 -0500
Organization: Rutgers University LCSR
Lines: 63
Message-ID: <3bl319$kpo@math.rutgers.edu>
Status: O

Jerking Off
	An erotic poem by Jeff Vogel

I've had good sex a thousand times,
and blowjobs by the score.
I've felched and necked with gerbils pure,
Had threesomes on the floor.

I've been to orgies, peeped and spanked,
and I don't care if you scoff.
For nothing beats the wild delights,
I get when jerking off.

I think of love in days gone by,
Without rancor or tiff,
And then I spray my manly juice,
while looking at a GIF.

I've tried true love,
It had its points.
Cuddling til' 3,
and puffing joints,

But I would rather fantasize
about rising up into a tree,
and harpy babes with latex wings,
would fly up and service me.

I have people from on the street,
any of them with stoke my lust,
and them switch to an amorphous being,
with ninty vaginas and an eight foot bust.

I imagine watching Roseanne,
and characters leaping out of the screen,
and hug me twice and spank me nice,
and service me real keen.

And when I get sweet release,
Drained of all stress and will,
I massage my nuts fast as I can,
To get them to refill.

I had a woman's lovely face
tattooed upon my cock.
It's my girlfriend now,
O' Yes, I hear you mock.

It's always faithful, always kind,
although sometimes its sore.
We're never alone, will die together,
and who could ask for more?

					- Jeff Vogel
					Copyright 1994
					All rights reserved.
					No public readings of
					this poem allowed without
					prior written permission of
					the poet.