Article: 261358 of talk.bizarre From: email@example.com (Brian J.Cash) Newsgroups: talk.bizarre Subject: Storee Date: 1 Dec 1995 15:23:34 GMT Organization: Bell Northern Research Lines: 63 Message-ID: <firstname.lastname@example.org> Status: O X-Status: <ding-ding> "Hello, sir. Can I help you?" 'I'm not sure...what do you have?' "Well...we stock a fine selection of off-the-shelf..." 'Well, I was looking for something...you know...personal.' "Ah! A custom job. Yes, we specialize in that, actually. Now then: what genre do you want?" 'Genre?' "Yes, what style do you want? What sort of feel?" 'Fairly simple. Nothing complicated. I...uh...can't afford much.' "No problem. We'll stick to a simple dialogue. Any props?" 'Maybe one...at the start.' "OK. Characters?" 'How much are they?' "The first is $20, then $15 for each after the first, or $75 a dozen." 'Two please.' "Only two? That's a bit thin, isn't it?" 'I told you I can't afford much.' "You realize that depth of character is extra." 'Then leave it out.' "I wouldn't recommend..." 'Look, it isn't going to be that long anyway so just skip it.' "OK, OK...location?" 'A store. Generic.' "Plot?" 'Skip it.' "Look, you have to have a plot." 'OK, make it something ironic and recursive.' "Irony we can do. I'll see what we can do about recursion...no promises." 'Whatever. I like those dots thing. Can I have a bunch of those?' "Dots thing, sir?" 'You know: dot, dot, dot.' "Marks of elipsis?" 'I guess...how much are those?' "Four for a dollar." 'Great! I'll take a dozen.' "Isn't that a bit much?" 'Nope. The more, the better.' "Single quotes or double quotes?" 'What?' "Single quotes of double quotes for the dialogue?" 'Oh. A bit of both, I guess.' "What type of ending would you like?" 'How much have I spent so far?' "One hundred and fifty seven dollars." 'What!!!' "Irony does not come cheap, my friend." 'Well, just make it ironicish, then.' "Ironicish?" 'You know: sort of like irony, but not quite.' "I might suggest an off-the-shelf model for your first attempt at this." 'Oh, this isn't my first attempt.' "Really." 'Yes. I think I'll stick with the custom job.' "If you insist." 'As for the ending: don't bother adding one.' "But then it will just end in ..." Brian /-|-\ -- Ningependa kujifunza KiBizarre kidogo. Kwa heri.