Article: 261376 of talk.bizarre Newsgroups: talk.bizarre From: email@example.com (the reverse-psychology major) Subject: accept it or not, i don't give a shit Message-ID: <DIxAB5.K8@world.std.com> Organization: The World Public Access UNIX, Brookline, MA Date: Fri, 1 Dec 1995 19:33:04 GMT Lines: 53 Status: O X-Status: i had a reallt good recipee to post for 'fts' day but i lost it, well, lost isn't the appropriate word. see, i was sitting on the crapper [that's right i sit when i shit, any problem with that?] and i reached over to get some toilet paper and IT WAS GONE! there wasn't any. so what could i do? i *had* to wipe my ass because momma always said 'wipe your ass after you shit'. well, i walked to the closet with my pants around my ankles to get some more. when i opened the closet IT WAS GONE! so there i was standing with my ass in the air and shit cakin' to my asshole. I NEEDED TO WIPE! so i reached forthe nearest paper, any paper. which happened to be on my desk [ok, it's not a desk, just a card table] well i grabbed some paper, quickly wiped my ass [to great relief, i must add] and went back to my desk to type in the recipe. it was at this point i noticed my mistake. so all i can do is repost the 'top-ten things that really sduck', here ya go: top ten things that really suck. -------------------------------- 10. punctured lungs 9. vaccum cleaners 8. straws 7. aquarium filter tubes 6. certain people [ if you know what i mean ] 5. lollipops 4. swimming pool filters 3. vampires 2. leeches ready ... 1. divine brown [ask hugh] beelzibub ps; this is true beelzibub -- this is my .sig. it's one of the best .sig's on the 'net'. i know what you're thinking: 'did he post 5 or 6 articles'? to tell you the truth i kinda lost track myself. so you gotta ask yourself one question: 'is it true?' huh, is it punk? come on, go for it. make my breakfast.