Article: 262030 of talk.bizarre
From: wayne26@epix.net (Mr. Play-A-Day)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Play-A-Day: Bowling Bowling
Date: 7 Dec 1995 11:22:25 GMT
Organization: The Lunacy Catapult
Lines: 76
Message-ID: <4a6iph$qsg@guava.epix.net>
Status: O
X-Status: 



Setting:  The bowling alley.  A solitary man bowls in the darkness.

Man:  I hate bowling in the dark, but it is the only way I can afford 
it.  If I waited until this bowling alley opened I could not affort it.

Voice in the darkness:  We know you are here.

Another voice:  We were waiting for you.

Man: (frightened)  Who is that?  Is that security?  I am not here to
 rob the place, I just wanted to get a few frames in.

Voice:  We are not security guards.  We are your friends.

Man:  Who are you?

Voice:  We are the new Brunswick bowling balls.  Lightweight yet
 sturdy, with the magic inner core that keeps your shots on target.

A man in uniform suddenly steps into the bowling lane.

Man in Uniform:  Alright alright break it up.  I'm McFadden of the
 Internet Advertising Police Department, Blatant Usenet Reference
 Division.  We have been watching you for some time now, and this
 is it.  You are under arrest.

Bowling Man:  Wait a minute.  What is the charge?

McFadden:  Unauthorized plugging of a consumer product.  Brazen tradename extolling.  And running a Usenet Play without a license.

Bowling Man:  Do you know who I am/

McFadden:  Well, not yet.

Bowling Man:  Good!  I'm outta here!  (he runs off)

McFadden:  Hmmmm.  That was unexpected.  (He turns towards
 bowling balls)  Well, at least I have you.  And I know your names!

Bowling Balls:  Oh yeah?  What are they?

McFadden:  Why, you are all Brunswick bowling balls, lightweight
 but sturdy.

Another man in uniform steps out.

New Man in Uniform:  Alright, McFadden, we have finally
 caught up to you.  It is so sad when a cop goes bad.

McFadden:  What do you mean?

New Man in Uniform:  That was just an unauthorized plug for
 Brunswick bowling balls.  You know, when you said they were
 lightweight but sturdy.

A third man steps out of the darkness, wearing a uniform.

Third man:  Okay, you both are under arrest.   We all know you
 are pirating old Monty Python skits and updating them for
 Usenet skits.  That's a crime in any book!

McFadden:  Monty Python?  You must be kidding!  We were
 stealing old The Simpsons' scripts.  Did we say and now for
 something completely different?  Or number nine the Larch?  No
 we did not.  

Third man:   Regardless of the lines, you were swiping the spirit
 of the skits.  Those Monty Python skits are classics, lightweight
 but sturdy.

Another man in uniform steps out of the darkness.  And so it goes.

The End