Article: 288661 of talk.bizarre
From: Matthew Marchese <>
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: Buddha Bing, Buddha Bang
Date: Sun, 01 Dec 1996 13:06:48 -0600
Organization: Arbeit Macht Muede
Lines: 54
Message-ID: <>
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The Road to Nirvana*

We're off on the road to Nirvana
That Kundalini was tough on our spines 
(hit me with a snake-bite kit, Dad)
What's my Dharma, where's your Dharma? We're lookin' high and low 
Lay you eight-to-five we'll meet the Buddha on the road

Off on the road to Nirvana
Non-existence's at the end of the line
(turn that wheel, yeah!)
I hear this great road's got no gate, it leaps out from our heads
We'd tell you more but we won't know it when we're good and dead

You won't find us sitting around
Like Dogen's koans we're Nirvana-bound

We're off on the road to Nirvana
Look out, clear the way, 'cause here we come
The monks sit Zazen, write some haikus, hit themselves with sticks
It seems to me that there should be easier ways to get our kicks
(should I slip on my big sandals now?)

Off on the road to Nirvana
Mu! swing a stick, everybody duck
(Hey, I think that last whack detached my self!)
We may run into Preta but we're not about to whine
Because we've read the Sutras, now we've both got bouyant minds

You won't find us moping around
Like Bassho's haiku we're Nirvana bound

You won't catch us sitting on the ground
(how DO you make a Buddha by meditating, Junior?
Don't ask me, Dad. I'm off to polish my mirror)
Like Zen Comics, we're Nirvana bound

Our Karma is totally sound
Like Bodhisattvas firmly rooted in the Vinaya of the Amida Buddha
(Oh, sweet Satori!)
We're NIR..VAN..AAAAAaaa Bouuuuuuuunnnnnnd!
(Hey, are we enlightened yet?)


(Owwwww! Oh, now I get it!)

* - with apologies to the Dharma of Johnny Burke and Jimmy Van Heusen
Matt Marchese              <URL>			
"We drink elixirs that we refine from the juices of the dying" -Shriekback