Article: 288723 of talk.bizarre From: stone@uclink2.berkeley.edu (Philip K Stone) Newsgroups: talk.bizarre Subject: FTS: Boxing Day Date: 2 Dec 1996 17:19:05 GMT Organization: Suck Failure Analysis Corp. Lines: 29 Message-ID: <57v32a$h57@agate.berkeley.edu> Doubtless many of you are searching for the perfect Xmas gift for that special little person in your life. Allow me to suggest some of my favorite new children's books: "Carl Has Lunch" - In this, the latest offering in the lavishly illustrated, wordless "Good Dog Carl" series, Carl the lovable Rottweiler is left alone with his infant charge for one day too many. Hungry Carl does what comes naturally, and hilarious hijinks ensue as the irrepressible canine arranges the gory aftermath to look like the work of Satanic cultists. "Granpa, Take Me Cowtipping" - The passage of wisdom from generation to generation and the gentle traditions of deeply inbred country folk are celebrated, as little Kyle and Jessica follow their drunken grandfather to a moonlit adventure. "The Little Booster Engine That Couldn't" - Sammy the Space Shuttle is convinced to do his job by NASA policy wonks, despite the reluctance he feels one cold Florida morning. "What is God? (II)" - The "Church" of $cient*l*gy makes its first foray into children's literature. Uncle Elron teaches little wogs that God is merely a bad slide show implanted on our consciousness by murderous space aliens. A coupon for a free personality test is included. Phil (IHNJH,IJLS "policy wonks")