From: (a hurricane triggered by a butterfly's wings)
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: bad tempered management
Date: 1 Dec 1997 19:58:56 -0800
Organization: the breaking of small, important bones
Lines: 44
Message-ID: <660120$gfk$>
X-Trace: 881035138 16246 plord

Let's You and Him Fight, Inc.
Internal Office Memo

1. Reminder: no perspiring is allowed, even when when the air
   conditioning is turned off.

2. Charles in engineering: My administrative assistant informs
   me that your wife handles breakups poorly; also, she has a
   rotten curveball.  I'm docking your salary to cover the cost
   of replacing his china, and, obviously, the sex-for-stock
   exchange is off.  Talk to me again when you're married to
   someone with more backbone.

3. Materials: I am nearly two-thirds of the way through this
   beverage, and the straw has not yet collapsed.  What happened
   to Quality Control?
4. I.T. Group, in Re: happy walkman-carrying enviro-commuters
   vs. annoying automotive-bound cellular interference.  Keep up
   the good work.  I'm still waiting, though, for those docs on
   the ultraviolent spectrum.

5. Reminder to Crisis Support staff: Terrorism is inherently
   suspicious.  Why are we paying for the tap into U.S.G.S. but
   not seeing more "natural" disasters?  Get with the program.

6. Crisis Support: also, Guam -- survivors?

7. Media team: While the beta for "Name that Drunk!" was
   promising, underground copies of "You Don't Know Crack!" are
   wiping the market with it.  Unless you can pull off the
   direct tabloid tie-in, with acceptable kickbacks, no go.

8. We're relying entirely too much on old favorites, Ireland,
   the Middle East, &c, and neglecting emerging markets. 
   Diversify, people; the last thing we want is an outbreak of
   global civility.

Warm, and I do mean warm, regards
Mento the Malfeasant
COO, L.Y.a.H.F., Inc.
a subsidiary of HELLCO