From: "nikolai kingsley" <>
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: FTSD: Viral Make Money Fast
Date: Tue, 1 Dec 1998 01:47:37 +1100
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I'd have to say, your honour, that it was at least partly Bruce Sterling's
fault. Long ago Gary had read a certain short story called "Our Neural
Chernobyl", and I am certain that this influenced his later ideas about
biochemistry. But, yeah, no point in dragging Mr Sterling into this.. he's a
good ole boy. Uh, Gary.. yeah. Well, the bastard had the mentality of a
railway grafitti tagger, unfortunately coupled with the intelligence
required to be effective in the field of microtech engineering. No-one with
any sense would have let him anywhere near a laboratory. Which is, of
course, where the defendant comes into it. Yeah, I expect you'd noticed.
He'd acquired the labs when WEHI went public and if you'd met him you could
tell he was aching to do something with them. Unfortunately he didn't
acquire any of the original WEHI staff. I guess they were all too ethical or
responsible or something. Characteristics that Gary lacks.

The original proposal was for something the defendant called 'fashionable
diseases'. Supposedly benign. They were designed to operate only in
metabolisms that were taking in over one thousand five hundred calories a
day, to preclude their attacking third-world nations. No-one had bothered to
think this through - how they were supposed to be regulated... purchased?
Who would buy a fashionable disease when you could simply sleep with someone
who already had it and catch it?

Mm-hm... I suppose so. While you're busy dragging people into this, you
might want to look up Paramount studios, the people who did the make-up worn
by Terry Farrell in "Deep Space Nine". That's where Gary got the idea for
the first of the "designer diseases", Sepherin-K-3347. It would excite
melanin-producing cells around the forehead, cheeks and neck, producing that
particular pattern of spots. Yes, there is a copyright infringement case
pending. Um, let me see.. yes, it was only supposed to last for a week.
Pardon? Yes, a counteragent has been found. But, yes, it was at this point -
seeing how well Sepherin worked - that the defendant announced his intention
to start selling genetic advertising space, and Gary went.. uh.. call it a
nervous breakdown if you want to. We like to say it's when he went apeshit.
He worked on the project sporadically and then quit, destroying most of his
notes and retiring to a retreat in Wangaratta run by the Church of the

I'd like to point out that by this stage, Gary was not, in fact, employed by
the defendant. Anyway. That, your honour, is where the viral "make money
fast" plague came from.

email me for gene sequence now!