From: "Jacques Treatment" <marcusm@teleweb.net> Newsgroups: talk.bizarre Subject: FTSD: White Noise/White Light Date: 3 Dec 1998 00:03:50 GMT Organization: Codemastery First, Then Death Lines: 23 Message-ID: <01be1e4f$ceadd120$ac79fcd1@ogyfobac> X-Newsreader: Microsoft Internet News 4.70.1162 People never talk about being healed by chaos, but that is exactly what happens every time I get to and get through a migraine. That one period where clarity and pattern start to come into phocus and little meanings come out of every particle of misread time and misexperienced wanderings. The song on the radio is very close to me, yet nobody knows I'm about to happen. Headache, pressure, pain in the blood vessels, jaws, yet also an understanding of the position of every cell, every mitochondria, every last bond of adenosine triphosphate. I put on a ring and hold myself in a chair, letting my mind spill out and blow like the storm around me. Coming in, going out, but always a storm. Messages of clarity flow like mirrored glass cracking and shattering inward from a rock thrown by somebody Outside the Home, every shard carrying the pattern of the lives and stories their in. I churn the signals, I bleed information. Kids, do *not* try this at home. I live in a field where entropy ticks like a metronome, and in a day, this will all be over, flow back into a meaningless life developing hours into something called a job. I can only work that job when I am healthy. jacques, simmering out of a whole in other parts