Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: FTSD participant's long pavement-dive
Summary: From a tall tower to a hard landing: HE'S LOSING IT, FOLKS!
Reply-To: (Kent Paul Dolan)
Followup-To: poster
Organization: Birthright Party "The birthright of humankind is the stars!"
Keywords: FTSD, it just kind of snuck up and caught me unprepared.
From: (Kent Paul Dolan)
Lines: 68
Message-ID: <Vgb14.349$>
Date: Wed, 01 Dec 1999 15:37:25 GMT
X-Trace: 944062645 (Wed, 01 Dec 1999 07:37:25 PST)
NNTP-Posting-Date: Wed, 01 Dec 1999 07:37:25 PST
X-Received-Date: Wed, 01 Dec 1999 07:39:35 PST (

I wanted to, wanted to, Fail to Suck,
I wanted to des per ate ly,
But my website was answering,
"Loser, get lost",
While I was web-cobbling, oh, me.

"Access forbidden"
Was all I could read,
Red was all that I could see,
And some tight assed PhuD was calling me out
For postering helpingfully.

My temper was gone,
My looks long shot,
My eyes and my typing the same,
But I never had learned,
"If you want not to lose,
You have to get out of the game."

I typed and I typed, I tried and I tried,
Doggerel was all I could find,
"Starvation, now there's an excuse", I thought,
An excuse finely crafted,
One carefully wrought,
Blood sugar vanish'ed,
[Hey, cancel that thought!]
Nothing was eaten, 'cause nothing I'd bought.
So a  leftover bagel, the bread's hard rind,
Got eaten 'round swallowing my pride.

How did we schedule, our FTSD game,
On Wuh-Cube'd Blackoutery Day?
I'm FTSDing, as hard as I can,
The owners don't notice, or me they would ban,
But the vacuum keeps calling my name.
A world of black screens, is calling,
And into them each, I'm falling.

I'm seeing my mug, done black on black,
On web pages every damned where.
"Have you seen this man?",
Who brains seems to lack?
He's forgotten 'bout combing his hair."

The rhymes didn't work,
The meter won't scan,
The mix of the tenses
Will be stirred in a pan,
O vapid the mind,
And palsied the hand,
Of the loser on Fail to Suck Day.

"FTSD, what's that? Just another silly TEE DOT BEE tradition of no
possible real world impact."

Then the NuNu got him.

             ===== random quote by or about this author =====

"Kent...writes:...I  love  it!   This is the best article posted to this
newsgroup yet!"
                                                         -- Mitch Dysart
Kent Paul Dolan.
<> <> <>
Pretense of web presense [poorly hidden] at
(just dumps you into a directory: glitz minus).  [Even more poorly maintained.]