From: "catbear" <>
Newsgroups: talk.bizarre
Subject: FTSD: The Lists
Date: Thu, 30 Nov 2000 19:15:04 -0500
Organization: cat bear dog cow
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Undiscovered Elements

 Tithium - Substance in communion wafers, causes financial confusion.
 Prosperon - A.K.A. Vitamin MAN.
 Menium - What sweat is made of.
 Televium - Produces extra-sensory perception.
 Gerbium - Main component of baby formula.
 Alurickel - What that stupid broken thing is made of.
 Mermarine - Causes that lovely sparkle in Ariel's tail.
 Urasendine - The element of foolishness.
 Kryptunic - Superman's clothes are woven from this stuff.
 Titassium - Corning's replacement for silicone.

Car Manufacturers in North Enthobia

 Chrysley - Family cars popular with foulmouthed bigots.
 Gentiac - For the older set.
 Rolvo - Sturdy, but prone to tip.
 Oldsmouth - Very popular with salesmen.
 Hontler - Upscale sedans with elk hood ornaments.
 Volkswaguar - Trimmed in fine leather, walnut burl, and macrame.

Snack Foods That Didn't Quite Make It

 Crunky - Pralined cashews good, salted coconut bad.
 Nutten - Tasty, but mostly packaging; a rip-off.
 Butte - Lumpy nutbars, wrapped two per package.  Eww.
 Frunch - Easy to loathe combination of truffles and brie.
 Carapper - No one would even buy this one.
 Pocolard - Failed attempt to market cold buttered popcorn bars.
 Drispy - Marshmallow covered fried shrimp.  Just didn't work.
 Brapper - Pop-rocks and lemon-lime soda in one.
 Pyremptas - Way, WAY too spic---
 Almony - It's great at first, but the aftertaste is a killer.

TV shows, 2010

 Rhody - Web site editor moves in with cold-sleep revived news writer.
 Lewitch - Obnoxious metaphysic from Europe (Children).
 Fatte - Bill Cosby just won't go away.
 Hillignie - Martial artist lady cop cuts up with quirky police squad.
 Smasier - Adventures of a goofy demolitions expert.
 Beanny - Adventures of a starch-intolerant restaurant reviewer.
 Stroker - Day-in-the-life drama of a shy geek.
 Goliday - Jim Nabors comes back as an angel (Musical-comedy).
 Fammemen - Six transsexals explore relationships in a one room apartment.
 Spoot - Couples compete to guess each other's Wet-and-Messy fetish.

Heroes that Never Made It into the Comics

 Latman - Charles Atlas's alter ego, only defends 98lb weaklings.
 Strawn - Harsh bringer to justice from Kansas.
 Offine - Primary power: really bad smell.
 Cyboy - Reached puberty and jacked into pay-per-view porn permanently.
 Spawkman - An electrician from Brooklyn; deadly but incomprehensible.
 Dartic - Hyperfast, sadly limited to sub-zero temperatures.
 Hoween - Noiresque martial artist just too damn whiny.
 Enterman - Keypunch operator with 500 WPM.
 Supertic - Fastest winker in the world; so what?
 Titats - Too preoccupied with petty squabbles to rate above amateur.
 X-Mange - Loses hair at an astonishing rate.

...A random word generator generated all of these words, given an
appropriate starting base (e.g. names of comic book heros, car companies,
etc).  I didn't edit anything, just selected the best words from the output