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January 1, 2000: inner-innermost-most person

Saturday

I'm not sure I'm EVER going to get used to writing "2000" as the year. Also, these web pages are no longer in chronological order when sorted by filename. Oh well. I knew this would happen when I named them that; I guess it's my own personal little y2k bug.

Perhaps ten years ago (or more) I measured my Myers-Briggs type using the Kiersey Temperament Sorter from the book "Please Understand Me", and came out as a *N**, although most people would say I was an INTP. If I recall correctly, there were 10 questions for I/E and 20 for each of the others, and I split I/E down the middle, and was within one of half-and-half of the last two.

Later tests generally have had me come out as an INTP or an INFP. In fact, I know why I came out splitting the I/E originally; because the test was measuring both reactions to strangers and preference for being alone versus being with others. I can't identify with the metaphor of needing to be alone to "recharge" my batteries--I'm the last person to leave a party if it's people I know--so I think I'm really more stranger-phobic than introverted.

I've never taken the MBTI (although I did take the MPII, which called me strongly introverted, but I don't think it's the same definition), but I recently retook a bunch of measurements over the web. One, which was actually just a menu-maze, and thus largely relied on a single answer to determine each letter (while actually letting you opt out of a question and then providing a different one to determine it) came out squarely INTP. Other, more detailed ones, tended to come out INTP or INFP, but with the P still very close to crossingly the line, and in some cases with the I at the boundary. (Some tests only ask about stranger-interaction scenarios, in which case I come out totally I.) From reading the temperaments, I think I'm pretty strongly P, actually, but I can't help answering certain kinds of "would you rather things be settled and determined, or uncertain" with the J answer, and I'm not sure what that means. (I guess it could mean that I'm not really realistically imagining my reaction to such scenarios.)

The two women I've met through that matchmaking system are INFJ and ENFP. I guess NF is my "type". (I don't know the MBT of any of the women from my past relationships, although I'm not sure any of them were my type anyway.)

I think the one is the only introvert I've ever dated, actually--it's hard for introverts to connect with introverts, I guess, plus we're much rarer than extroverts. (Hmm, that sentence has me buying into being an introvert.) I feel more "connected" to the E after only one meeting than after three dates with the I, but I'm pretty sure this is illusory--due to the gregarious nature of the E's personality making me comfortable, rather than any real spark, since those tend to come to me slowly. But I can't really be sure, it's all a bit mysterious. I'd really rather not have two opportunities to pursue at once; I'd really rather the choice was settled and decided. (Of course, one of them could easily take the choice out of my hands at any time. And both of them could read this--one thing about meeting someone online, they're certainly going to be capable of browsing one's webpage.)

PS: One of these two women doesn't live in Somerville, so scratch what I said in my last entry.


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attribution dammit: Crash Lisa Germano